Ever since high school this has been the kind of reaction I get when people see me. All this just cause my dad has a lot of money and everyone thinks I'm so cool for it. But I hate it, they don't even know me and yet everyone tries so hard to be like me, if they knew how my life really is then I would not be getting this much attention. I hate having to put on this image of beauty queen and smart girl. When in reality I actually hate wearing makeup and designer brand names and need a private tutor to actually pass some of my classes. Through out all of this my one and only best friend has been with me and she is the only one who knows the real me but at the beginning of senior year she moves to another country and we stopped talking. Not that I don't have any other friends but none of them know me, the real me behind the glamour girl.
Finally making my way to the center of the crowd I recognize Becky from my science class on the floor with her books scattered around her. The girls from my drama class are standing near and pointing and laughing. One of them grabs one of Becky's books and starts mocking her, "look at me I think I'm smart cause I read". In my head I cringe because that very same book is sitting on my table beside my bed. I look down and see tears brimming under Becky's glasses and I turn to look at the snickering faces in the crowd. Ok Melody, you can do two things. You can stick up for this girl and finally stop being someone your not or you can turn around and pretend you never saw what happened here. Knowing that if I turned around I would hate myself forever and I would have finally completed creating myself as someone who I hated I decided to step up.
"Really Amber, we can't all be like you, some of us actually do read and are smart because of it". Grabbing the book, I help Becky up and hand it to her, "here you go". "um t- thank y- you" averting her eyes quickly away.
"what's the deal Melody?" Amber retorts. "Thought you were cool". Taking a deep breath I say "yes cause cool constitutes making fun and looking down on other people". I turn towards the crowd, "is this what we have become, we have become the kind of people who are insecure they decide to pick on others just to make themselves feel better?". Many people in the crowd started mumbling and staring at me. Great Melody, now everyone thinks your crazy.
Becky took a step to leave and I grab her arm and walk down the hall with her, everyone making room for us to leave still in shock after what I had done. Then Amber goes, "I knew it all along, your actually one of them, you don't belong at the cool table". I role my eyes and tell Becky to just ignore her and to keep walking.
Steve comes up and blocks our path. Ok now I should mention that Steve not so long ago was my boyfriend and second most popular person in school next to me. Now what have I done? I quickly look at Becky who has gone a little pale. I stand up straight and ask "what's up?". He looks from me to Becky and then looks behind us at the crowd who is watching us leave unsure of what to do with themselves. "wow, your my idle" as he pats me on the shoulder. Surprised my mouth hangs open a little and I try to say something but nothing comes out. Laughing to himself he walks to the side of Becky and takes some of her books, "So are we just going to stand here or are we going to escort a pretty lady out of here". Blushing Becky mummers a thanks and I nod. As we start leaving Amber shrieks loudly "OMG, not you too Steve. Gosh can't you see she is so uncool?" Before I can get the words out some kids from the crowd yell "shut up Amber, you are so uncool" and the crowd finally disperses leaving her struck dumb with her friends trying to comfort her.
Kate- Your story is the popular girl who is hiding from herself and this is where she reveals who she wants to be and she is still pretty cool. She has a revalation and it is within a small amount of time, good job.
ReplyDeleteKate-
ReplyDeleteI really liked your story because it was new and fresh. Most people talk about how the popular girl is cool because she makes fun of others, but in your story your girl is cool because she stands up for others. That was a nice twist, and i really liked how you wrote your story and how it flows. Great job =)
-Rachel
I like how you made the narrator a well respected kid and she is not cocky about it.
ReplyDelete^-^ I like your story a lot. And the ending was funny too, yelling back at that Amber girl.
ReplyDelete"Cool" story
-Jia Min
Kate,
ReplyDeleteI liked how you used the image of a rich girl, one that is usually portrayed as mean and snotty, but instead twisted her character to someone who is considerate and sympathizes with others. I like how you had her break out of her mask and still ended up cool despite the change. As a result, her change has encouraged others to look past their own masks and reveal themselves as well.
Story of a cool girl who doesn't think she's actually cool, nice and a little different from everyone's stories. She actually seemed like she believed she was not cool at all. The story did follow the archetype where the main character had to choose one or the other. I thought the story could have been better if you made it actually sound like teenagers. I dialogue was awkward at times. Is Becky cool, for playing the role of smart kid?
ReplyDelete