Parenting

I guess my answer will be a cliche. Children should grow up in loving and caring environments where they have the opportunity to grow up in an open space where they have the chance to think for themselves. I know for me it wasnt like the typical family I saw on TV, no big loving family that gets together every weekend, no family of three with a mom and a dad and possibly a sibling. I grew up with none of that but I have to say I wouldnt trade my family for the world. Not saying there were certain moments in my life where I would look around and see kids playing with their dad and think to myself, hmm I wish I had one or to come home to a sibling where it wasnt me by myself. But my family was great and what I mean by family is my mom, me and my cats. And for the longest time I grandparents. We would go every weekend and my grandfather used to own a restaurant so I always loved the food he made. That was my family since the rest of the family never hung out at my grandparents and I would only see them during the holidays. So I grew up with my mom, single parent who did put me in day care since she had to work. None of that was bad. I met new people and learned new things and because of that, I have always been open to new things and meeting new people cause they have so much to teach us. Also because my mother was a single hard working parent I admired her Independence and hard work. And even though she worked she never let that get in the way of our time together. We always had so much fun going places and exploring.

Im not so sure what a family should be since mine has always been consistent of just my mom and me. I know the saying it takes a village to raise a child but my mom did fine on her own. Though i do believe in raising a child there needs to be some community. A child needs love, care and attention, and those things come from many different people since there are many different forms. And this way a child is not only gaining one persons insights but many perspectives on life and the world and are able to form a opinion about life on their own.

The first article was interesting because though it doesn't work on her kids, in schools, teachers use the same strategy on students and the students do not even notice it is happening to them. They go along with it and have it in their heads that they are empowered and have control and make decisions about their lives even though, they still were given those options, they did not choose anything but what was given to them. So the strategy in my opinion shows this to children and opens their eyes to the fact that in reality they do not have a choice, no free will since the parent is still in charge and monitoring the options given. But one of the children instead of choosing the two options given to her, choose something completely different and in the hand was handed it.

I have mixed feelings about the Ferber method. I feel like that is wrong of a parent to leave their kid crying and to let them just cry themselves out. It would be horrible for me to sit and listen to my child cry and cry until it knows no one is coming for it. But I feel in a bigger perspective of this, the concept that the child and baby will learn from it is an important skill that most grown adults still need to grow used to. And that is there is no hand holding in life, no one walks around with you holdign your hand and making sure your ok and doing all the right things. More then not, you'll be there doing it yourself.